My Nomination Bid For ‘World’s Worst Mother’

On any given, normal day I would confess that I’m not a half-bad Mum. I spend plenty of time with my kids, I play boardgames with them, I read to them everyday. I feed them, dress them, and cuddle them when they’re crying. Unfortunately, yesterday wasn’t a normal day.

Perhaps I jinxed it when I decided to scam a few extra minutes in bed to finish off that chapter of the book I was reading?

It was first thing in the morning and daughter was hungry! No suprises there, she always seems to be hungry (except for at dinner time of course because I serve up horrible food like chicken, or carrots, or mash potato). But everything was good, hubby volunteered to get up and feed the munchkins breakfast. Awesome!!! I switched on the light and grabbed a book and managed to get through that chapter (plus perhaps one or two more ;) ). Then with some regret I put down the book and made my way to the shower.

Apparently while I was in the shower hubby and the kids decided that they really needed to get a brand new drawing game for Daughters new iPod Touch. In order to get the new game onto all our many Apple devices without wasting our meagre internet allowance I wanted to download the game onto my laptop first and then transfer it. So with my stomach still protesting its emptiness I plugged in the laptop and fired it up.

Picture this if you can. The laptop is sitting on the coffee table in my lounge room. My 3 yr-old son is beside me on the lounge, bouncing around excitedly because soon he will be playing a new Dora the Explorer art game on my iPhone. In order to pick up the laptop I have to stand up, but of course I’m lazy so I just rock forward onto my feet and then drop back down onto the lounge with the computer now held firmly in my hand. Only one problem in the 2 seconds it takes me to rock forward, grab the laptop and then rock back, my son throws himself across the lounge exactly where I had been sitting so when I collapse back down I land on him.

I don’t know if I noticed he was there at the last second or not, it all happened too quickly. But I think I might have and automatically tucked myself further forward, the problem being that instead of his whole body taking my weight, I ended up landing on just his right shoulder. I felt the ‘pop’. Then I heard the scream.

Of course it wouldn’t be much of a story if my poor parenting ended there would it. For about twenty minutes I sat with him trying to determine if he was really, truly hurt before I decided that I better head for the hospital. He was upset, but was he that upset? He was able to lift his arm and wiggle his fingers etc so I was fairly certain nothing was broken but perhaps it was dislocated? In the end I decided better safe than sorry so to the hospital we went. Daughter stayed home with Hubby.

The local emergency department, unbelievably enough, didn’t have any doctors on call on a Saturday morning so the nurses suggested I go to a Medical Centre about a 20 minute drive away because they have an X-ray machine there and the wait times wouldn’t be as long. The girls there were lovely and we managed to bypass all the poor souls in the waiting room.

The doctor looked down her nose at me with those judgemental eyes that say ‘you must be an attention seeker because there seems to be absolutely nothing wrong with your child’. Note that by this point Son was no longer crying, he was demading cookies (which of course I didn’t have but some other mother in the waiting room had been feeding them to her child and he wanted some too). The doctor asked him to raise his arm, which he managed to do without a murmur, then she poked and prodded along his shoulder and collarbone, naturally Son didn’t even flinch. I got the ‘why are you even here look’ again. Or course, better safe than sorry, so she sent us for an X-ray anyway.

While waiting for the X-ray Son perked up even further, he wasn’t quite up for singing and dancing but the kid clearly wasn’t acting like someone with any kind of major injury. I downgraded my prediction from dislocation to maybe just a pulled muscle.

Or course, then we had the X-ray.

 

Even my inexperienced eyes had no difficulty spotting the break. I immediately burst into a bout of guilt-ridden tears. The radiographer didn’t really know what to do.

When we went back to see the doctor her eyes were no longer full of judgement, to be honest, she looked quite embarassed.

With nothing more than a few doses of nurofen and sling Son is doing fine and excluding a brief altercation with a t-shirt while we were getting dressed this morning, there have been no more tears. There is no denying that I have one brave little boy.

 

 

 

ROW80 – Obviously it’s not my fault!

Lack of motivation? The start of the Olympics? Where can we lay the blame when things don’t go as planned? Because, obviously, it’s not my fault.

 

GOALS FOR ROW80 ROUND 3

1. Read 10 books and watch 10 movies to keep me on track to hit 50 for the year. Watched – The Blind Side (One of those movies I’ve been meaning to watch for ages but didn’t get around to it until it was on telly last week – totally worth the wait, loved it) Total thus far =  3/10. Read – Yellow Cake by Margo Lanagan (A compilation of short stories. Loved some, hated some, but overall I like my shorts with a nifty twist at the end and these left me wanting) Total thus far = 4/10.

2. Keep exercising as often as possible (preferably 2-3 times a week). Ummm [hangs head in shame]… well… no. None. Zero. Zip. Not a one. There’s nothing else to say.

3. Write 5000 words a week on either of my two current projects. 1 word on Project 1 + 1817 words on Project 2 = 1818 words total. No that’s not a typo somehow I managed to add 1 word to my novel over the course of a whole week. I don’t know how that happened, so don’t ask. Obviously I was not even close to my goals. I did also write 696 words towards a short story, but still a complete and utter fail.

4. Complete one additional ‘Spring Cleaning’ project per week. Cleaned out both the kids wardrobes and sorted Son’s bookshelf. Thank god there is some light at the end of the tunnel!

5. Try and find some time in among all that to do some edits on Soul Hunter and send it out for another round of beta reading in prep for serious editing. I’m up to 17% so I completed another 7% this week, not a complete fail, but not the 10% I was hoping for either.

 

Not a great week by any stretch, but we all have those weeks don’t we? Don’t we? Please tell me we do.

As always I love hearing from you.

Jody Moller

 

Week 3 Already – How the ROW time flies by!

Three weeks down and time for another ROW80 update. I’m pretty pleased with my progress so far, I’ve managed to keep up with all my goals (as diverse as they are) and still feel like I’m mostly on top of things.

By the way, I’m now on Goodreads (I don’t know why it took me so long). Anyway, I would love to be friends with you all, so make sure you look me up and befriend me.

Also, in case you didn’t know I now have a Facebook Author Page. If you haven’t already, I would love for you to ‘like’ it. Here’s the link. Cheers!

 

GOALS FOR ROW80 ROUND 3

1. Read 10 books and watch 10 movies to keep me on track to hit 50 for the year. Watched – Nothing (Actually not entirely true, I watched National Treasure last night and Alvin and the Chipmunks today with the kids but I’ve seen them before so they don’t count) Total thus far =  2/10. Read – Read my Dead by Emerald Barnes (I’m three books for three weeks and almost finished another, I don’t think I’m going to have any problems with these goals) Total thus far = 3/10.

2. Keep exercising as often as possible (preferably 2-3 times a week). Only once this week, but I also went to the Dentist for the first time in 12 years, so I think it was a pretty good week for health and fitness so I’m going to give myself a break.

3. Write 5000 words a week on either of my two current projects. 4368 words on Project 1 + 0 words on Project 2 = 4368 words total. Missed the total again, but wrote more words on Project 1 this week than I have in previous weeks and managed to get the word count for that novel up over 30,000 words, so all in all pretty happy.

4. Complete one additional ‘Spring Cleaning’ project per week. Cleaned all the windows in the front room – they look gorgeous and sparkly, now I just have to get the motivation to clean all the other windows in the house!

5. Try and find some time in among all that to do some edits on Soul Hunter and send it out for another round of beta reading in prep for serious editing. Da Da Da DAAAAA! Yes, I finally started the latest round of edits. I’m 10% done (the advantage of editing on my Kindle is it’s easy to know exactly how far through the document I am). I’m going to aim for another 10% this week, fingers crossed.

 

How are you going? Do you have goals as diverse as mine? Are you able to keep up with them all or are they swamping you? As always I love hearing from you.

Jody Moller

Show me, Don’t tell me – My new parenting mantra

Since I began writing there has been one phrase I’ve heard  more times than any other – Show Don’t Tell! Don’t tell the reader that the girl isn’t interested in taking on another case, show them how she hangs up the phone and casually goes back to playing sudoku on her computer. Don’t tell the reader that the man thinks the woman before him is sexy as all hell, show them how he can’t take his eyes off her cleavage.

It’s only recently, however, that I realised this phrase could be applied to more than just my writing. Show Don’t Tell is my new parenting mantra.

Did you know that children of parents that smoke are more than twice as likely to take up the habit themselves? Not that I smoke, of course, but it makes you think about what other habits we might have that we might be unconsiously rubbing off on our children. It goes hand-in-hand with smacking your children and then telling them in the next breath that it’s not okay to hit. Sometimes I think we have our heads screwed on backwards.

So why am I telling you this? Well, last week I took my kids to the dentist for the first time. I was a fountain of useful information about how important it was for them to go to the dentist every 6 months, about how the dentist needs to make sure their teeth are growing correctly and that they are doing a good job brushing their teeth. I was the queen supreme of Telling. But despite all my Telling, Daughter was scared, near on terrified, and Son who takes most of his cues from his sister, was heading down the same pathway.

I couldn’t understand it, I’d told them it would be fine, why didn’t they believe me? The fact is that if you’re going to talk the talk you have to be willing to walk the walk. How could I possibly expect them to walk happily into the dentist’s office when I wasn’t willing to do the same?

Dentophobia – it’s real and I have it. I don’t like spiders and I don’t like enclosed spaces but for me they aren’t phobias. The dentist, that’s a phobia. Just sitting here writing about it has my heart pounding in my chest. 12 years, give or take a few months. That’s how long it’s been since I last went to the dentist.

As everyone does with a phobia I can explain the reasons behind my fear, it seemed like virtually everytime I went to the dentist as a kid the guy was pulling teeth out of my mouth (I’d had 5 baby teeth and 4 permanent teeth extracted before my 11th birthday), then braces for 3 years, then fillings, then my wisdom teeth extracted. Ahh!!! I think I’m having heart palpitations.

But if I want to Show my children that the dentist isn’t scary and that it really IS important to go for regular check-ups then I need to face my fears and sit in that terrifying chair that goes up and down. So I am! Tomorrow, I’m going to the dentist! Wish me luck, I’m going to need it.

What about you? Are you a believer in showing rather than telling your kids how to behave? Do you have any fears, irrational or otherwise? As always I love hearing from you.

Jody Moller

Tis a ROW80 Update

Hi Boys and Girls. Had a good week? I’ll give you a heads up, mine’s been great! Details on my individual goals are below.

 

GOALS FOR ROW80 ROUND 3

1. Read 10 books and watch 10 movies to keep me on track to hit 50 for the year. Watched – Aliens in the Attic (Embarrassingly enough Hubby and I watched this without either of our children present and even more embarassingly I actually thought it was quite funny) Total thus far =  2/10. Read – City of Bones by Cassandra Clare (enjoyed it, but it wasn’t as good as I was expecting) Total thus far = 2/10.

2. Keep exercising as often as possible (preferably 2-3 times a week). Twice again this week… Yay me! (Have done too many lunges though and now my quads are killing me).

3. Write 5000 words a week on either of my two current projects. 2933 words on Project 1 + 2093 words on Project 2 = 5026 words total. Big cheer because I hit my weekly total for the first time!

4. Complete one additional ‘Spring Cleaning’ project per week. Cleaned out and tidied up the kids art and craft cupboard and Daughter’s bookshelves.

5. Try and find some time in among all that to do some edits on Soul Hunter and send it out for another round of beta reading in prep for serious editing. [Cough] Umm… No.

 

So excluding my edits on Soul Hunter (and let’s face it, my goal does state TRY and find some time :) ) I hit all my goals this week.  Oh yeah, and I think I might have finally come up with title’s for at least two of the novels in my Ankhari trilogy!

What about you? Good week? Bad week? Are you having to change your goals to fit in with your hectic lifestyle? As always I love to hear from you.

Jody Moller

ROW80 – Week One: The brief version

One week in, well as the round strictly speaking started last Monday I guess we are only 6 days in… but whose counting? My goals/hits/misses for the week are listed below.

GOALS FOR ROW80 ROUND 3

1. Read 10 books and watch 10 movies to keep me on track to hit 50 for the year. Watched – Snow White and the Huntsman (was actually much better than I was expecting). Read – Circle of Flight by John Marsden (the final book of the Ellie Chronicles). So two big ticks for me here.

2. Keep exercising as often as possible (preferably 2-3 times a week). I exercised twice this week so not too bad.

3. Write 5000 words a week on either of my two current projects. 1555 words on Project 1 + 2459 words on Project 2 = 4014 words total. Not the 5000 I was hoping for but for a 6 day week not a  bad effort. I might push myself to try for 6000 for next week… maybe.

4. Complete one additional ‘Spring Cleaning’ project per week. Helped hubby put in the joists for our new deck and grouted the new tiles in the pool – not strictly speaking spring cleaning but took me two days of hard work so I am putting them in here.

5. Try and find some time in among all that to do some edits on Soul Hunter and send it out for another round of beta reading in prep for serious editing. I didn’t even look at Soul Hunter, though I did get feedback back from one of the round one beta readers. I had a good week with everything else so I’m going to give myself a break on this one :)

Reading Circle of Flight by John Marsden this week I came across this passage. I loved it, so I thought I would share it with all of you.

‘And suddenly they came out of the woodwork. I don’t actually know what that expression means. What come out of the woodwork? Cockroaches maybe. Mice? Are these rhetorical questions, like I just learned about on one of my rare visits to school? Was that a rhetorical question? Is it a paradox when you ask rhetorically if a rhetorical question is rhetorical question? I think I’d better stop this before I get a headache.’

John Marsden, Circle of Flight p242

 If you’ve never read a John Marsden book I would highly recommend the whole Tomorrow Series and the follow up trilogy The Ellie Chronicles. He is a master of the written word and after 10 books still managed to come up with an ending that was, mostly, satisfying.

How are your ROW80 goals going? Have you started like a bullet out of a gun or are you more of a work-up-to-it kind of person? Have you read any of John Marsden’s books? As always I love hearing from you.

Jody Moller

Resolutions, Hits and Misses and Another Round of ROW80

It’s July! The 2nd of July to be precise which means that not only are we more than half way through the year, but today signifies the start of another round of ROW80 (the writing challenge A Round of Words in 80 Days – go here if you want to find out more about it). What better time to look back at my resolutions for 2012 and see how I’m going.

At the beginning of the year I listed the following goals:

 

1. Exercise 3 x 1hrs per week

2. Read 50 books and watch 50 movies this year

3. Participate in all 4 rounds of ROW80

 

So how am I going?

1. Exercise 3 times a week – Well… I’ll be honest, I haven’t exercised 3 times a week every week for the whole six months. In fact, I’m probably averaging somewhere about the 1-2 times a week mark. But I am still exercising, and for me that’s huge. The exercise goal is normally abandoned by the end of January so I’m chuffed that I’m still going at all.

2. Read 50 books and watch 50 movies this year – This is well and truly on track. I am up to 30 books and by coincidence I just finished watching The Vow which also gives me a total of 30 movies. You can find a list of all the books and movies thus far here. I have so many books of my TBR list that I should have no problem completing this goal.

3. Participate in all 4 rounds of ROW80 – well I have participated in the two rounds thus far but haven’t achieved the level of sucess I would have liked in either of them. Of course, this round will be completely different (I have the feeling I may have heard that somewhere before!).

 

GOALS FOR ROW80 ROUND 3

1. Read 10 books and watch 10 movies to keep me on track to hit 50 for the year.

2. Keep exercising as often as possible (preferably 2-3 times a week).

3. Write 5000 words a week on either of my two current projects. I was finding it difficult to hit my word targets on one novel, but I think that if I can split it across two different projects I should succeed… I hope :) This can be downgraded if I am failing miserably.

4. Complete one additional ‘Spring Cleaning’ project per week (for example, cleaning out the fridge, getting the cobwebs off the outside of the house…) BTW I know it’s still winter here – I’m getting in early.

5. Try and find some time in among all that to do some edits on Soul Hunter and send it out for another round of beta reading in prep for serious editing (I am still seriously considering the possibility of publishing this book early next year… here’s hoping)

 

What about you? Have your goals been good to you this year? And have you been good to them? Are you participating in the next round of ROW80? As always I love hearing from you.

Jody Moller